You can’t go more than 2 feet out your door without encountering someone with anxiety today.
It’s literally everywhere and a part of society like gum to the bottom of a shoe.
As moms, it’s one of those things that hits hard after a newborn, in the postpartum phase. You think of way too many “what if” scenarios and in some cases they become all too realistic for us that we end up seeing them as facts rather than the impractical notions that they are.
But, are we supposed to live like this?
In Matthew 6 Jesus talks about worry. But we all knew this right? HE says ““Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?”
Matthew 6:25-27 ESV
According to Jesus anxiety shouldn’t be a part of our daily lives.
It’s another way of saying we don’t trust Him. It’s our way of saying “Hey God, I know you’re the maker of the universe and of me, but let me take care of this one.” Or another “God, I know that you love me, but you may not know what’s best for me.”
I’ve struggle with worry all of my adult life, and if you know me in person it’s not something I’ve hidden from. But it’s also not something I’m proud of.
At the beginning of last year I had hit an all time low. My body was an absolute mess, literally surviving day to day. My postpartum was the hardest mentally, that I’d had. I had the fallacy that things would get better, but not actually changing course in order for that to happen.
And that’s when I finally took drastic measures.
I cut out things in life that caused me anxiousness. Which included social media. I decided to go see a Dr.- one of my biggest fears, and face whatever the worst case scenario would be.
And you know what? It WAS NOT the worst case scenario.
I found out that I have a condition called postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome or POTS for short. A condition that isn’t fatal, and in my case not severe.
Anxiety is a huge part of it. Your body doesn’t function from your brain to your toes the way it’s designed to.
In short POTS is a condition where The blood tends to “pool” in the lower body, and the heart panics, racing at a high speed to try and get oxygen back up to the head. The result of this is fainting spells, headaches, digestive issues, heart racing, fatigue, brain fog, dizziness, hard to breath, etc.
Now hold on, I could use my diagnoses strictly as a crutch for my worry and anxiety. Play victim. But in the end is it not my own choice? My own responsibility?
I started spending time devoted in prayer like I never had before. Praying over the aspects of life that I was most anxious about and letting go. I prayed so hard in my excruciating moments that God would truly help me in my unbelief. I saw change. I prayed that I would understand His love.
I opened up to my sisters in Christ, sharing deep hurts and things that I held onto. I felt free.
Within months I saw a difference. Relief.
There’s no gut drink that’s going to just save you. There’s no pill that will just make all your worries go away. These are bandaids. They don’t heal the main wound.
Don’t let the fear of “what ifs” stop you. Don’t let Satan convince you to just settle in an acceptant downfall.
So much of our negative -spiritual, mental, and physical health- is because we’ve allowed our flesh to convince us there’s nothing we can do to change.
Fight for that. My husband deserved a better wife, my children deserved a better mother, and the body of Christ deserved a better sister.
Why am I sharing all of this?
Because I know, out there. Another mamma has felt the same way I did.
I know you feel alone, miserable, tired, and sick of it living the same way everyday.
Change can happen. It’s hard, excruciatingly hard. But oh it’s so worth it. 🤍 Take that first step. God is with you.
Fellow mamma,
Shantel 🫶🏻
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